Singing:: I'm in love with a stripper

I'd been anticipating going out this weekend all week, I had the idea of the outfit I wanted to wear and all. But on saturday my clothes didn't fit right, my hair wouldn't act right, I was wasting time, I decided I didn't want to go. I was in the company of my niece Jadyn and she calls herself the 'kid stylist' when me and Keonia go out she dresses us, she said no I need to wear my black skinny jeans, my lace black shirt,and my leopard heels, so I did.

I went to a strip club with friends. I had never been before so I didn't know what to expect other than men dancing naked. I am so lame yall, I was nervous. LOL. Maybe because I didn't really know if they would touch you or not.???

Anyway, I was sipping my cocktail when the party began and these men came out dancing with the baddest bodies (good) strong arms, abs outta this world, popping and gyrating. OMG enough said. I was really enjoying the sights and watching these women act like they were the only men left on earth. But still understanding because they were fine as hell.

But baby, when Mr. Incredible came out, I was instantly a groupie, it was no one else in the room but me watching him. This man was chocolate, rock hard abs, swag, sexy, popping his body and looking directly at me. Did I mention he was chocolate, rock hard body, sexy and looking at me? Oh Lawd!!!!
My eyes did not leave that man the whole time he performed and not until I left the building. Everytime we would catch eye contact he would wink at me. (lol, i'm giggling) But in between time a few hours later I asked Tara to take our picture together, he gladly did. I wrapped my arms around his hard body and this mans smell mesmerized me. LMAO!!!

I whispered some encouraging words in his ear and we chatted for a minute, he gave me his card and told me to give him a call anytime :)

I must admit my first experience at a exotic club was an awesome one, Watching those fine, strong brothers dance and pop their bodies..... was lovely. But there was one other guy who kept appearing wherever I was, I could've swore he said his name was Lust:) I talked with him for a minute he grabbed me and hugged me, oh boy this guy was caramel, nice skin, nice teeth, clean, sexy yall, young, strong and smelled delicious!!!! He didn't perform but he should have. I got his digits and I had to leave, my soul was overwhelmed by then.

I woke up this morning and reality hit me that I can't be anything to these men, it was intoxicating fun and thats all. Even though I talked to them both today. Hee!! Hee!!

Fire

I've been saying for a while now, we need to have another pit fire and throw our demons in the fire. But seeing now that it's a blizzard outside i'm sure thats not going to happen soon. I remember throwing my fear and self doubt in the fire it felt good, I wasn't sold on the idea though and it didn't happen when the paper left my hands, but as time has gone on I am less fearful and way less self doubting myself.

We all participated and wanted to better ourselves by coming together that cold evening, being vulnerable, writing our changes out on paper, throwing our worries in the fire and protesting our wants for the universe to hear. We all had different goals, worries, aspirations and wishes that night. We come from different walks of life, we all could possibly be going in different directions but we were all the same in one way. We are women, mothers, sisters, and friends. And I say we plan a date.

I'm ready to throw some more shit in the fire, and this time I might need a notebook.

If I haven't said it lately
I Love You :)

I'm not mad, damnit!!!!

I knew from the time I opened my eyes to shut off my alarm at 7:30 am, I should've stayed home. I woke up earlier this morning at 3 to give Kami some milk and I couldn't go back to sleep so I turned the tv on and of course went on facebook. So I didn't go back to sleep til after 4am.

So anyway today feels like a monday morning rather than the friday it is; the last day of the frickin week. I should be happy and oh so glad. The first thing I did when I got to work was buy a coke, I ended up drinking coffee anyway. So i'm in my zone at work, thinking and working and coloring and thinking and working and the convo goes like this to me

"what's the attitude about?
what attitude? I don't have an attitude
"you look mad"
i'm not mad, i'm fine (smiling)
"oh she's crabby today"
I'm not mad, I don't have an attitude, and I'm not crabby
"well it's a black woman thang, she's got a permanent attitude"

My eyebrows go up now,
"I WASN'T FUCKING MAD, BUT SINCE YALL KEEP SAYING IT, NOW I'M FUCKING MAD"
"oh maybe she needs a timeout so she can calm down

WTF!!!!!!!!!!!
I can't wait til this day is over

Long time no hear from

It's been a while, I'm back now I had to take a small break. Some many things have occured in the meantime also, I had a breakdown at work (mofo's pissing me off) I had a breakdown at home (goddamn Boy) but i've also had many many happy, laughing moments. My selling Avon has been steady not to mention; Fun. I enjoy it very much. I never thought I would like anything to do with sells but nope; I like.

I've also gotten two matchmaking chances, one was not a go, the second matchmaking I did is in the process right now. Stella is on a date, yall!!!!! I actually had this thought the other day; when the hell is my matchmaker gonna make it happen for me?
Shit if I hook everybody else up, i'm gonna still be stuck with the same stick in the mud? I guess my prince will arrive shortly, until then i'll wait patiently.