I've been going back and forth in my mind about my past and my future, and I think we need another pit fire, I have some things to write down and burn. Its time for me to stop letting my past dictate my future, it's time to stop my past from dictating my feelings for today and tomorrow, its time to put the past in the past. If I didn't have a past I wouldn't grow and I need to remember this everyday. Good or bad our past is food for our growth. Its also time for me to stop worrying and even caring what other people think or say about me.
I have really turned into a chump!!!
A year or two ago, I didn't give a **** what nobody said or thought, damn I can't wait to get back to normal and find myself again, so I can tell it how I feel it.
Monday, June 21, 2010
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Lost
so having kids can really run you ragged, most of us look at the vacation commercials and just day dream about getting a break at least for a few hours. A jamaican trip would be nice also. But I must say in two days my baby is going to Atlanta for a couple of days and I feel sick. What am I suppose to do while he's gone? I am missing him already its sickening I know but my stomach is in knots and I feel a headache coming on. I could catch up on some sleep or actually have the big tv to myself or just chill with no interruptions but. Im just gonna call it a night because I feel like im gonna cry. My right hand will be gone for a few days and I feel lost already :(
Monday, June 14, 2010
Annoyed
It doesn't take a lot to annoy me, but lately I have been extra annoyed. wondering what this time????
ok so lately everytime i'm out in public I might of course people watch here and there and glance over at people and lately I have just been seeing the nastiest shit ever. GROWN ASS MEN DIGGING IN THEIR NOSES IN PUBLIC!!!!
Yesterday at Kmart we were walking to our car and one man was actually sitting with the car door open one leg out digging in his nose for a few more minutes before he went inside the store, I could not stop staring at him, and he actually stared at me too as if I was doing something so gross. I gave him the meanest look ever, you know the look where your nose flares and your lips kinda pucker, like UGH!!
Then today in rush hour traffic, I mean bumper to bumper I just glanced over again to my right and yet another man driving with one hand and digging in his nose with the other, that is the nastiest shit ever, I cannot get over this, I was mugging him so bad I almost hit the car in front of me, I wanted to roll down my window and scream "you nasty ass, get some tissue" but I stayed in my own car and kept my composure.
How could I forget before I got on the expressway after work I stopped to get gas and it was about 4 people standing out pumping gas and enjoying the warm breeze, I guess the guy in the mercedes thought he was all that, so he was like leaning on his benz pumping his gas and guess what??? DIGGING IN HIS GOTDAMN NOSE!!!!! I mean I looked at him and rolled my eyes, how could people not be more discreet? I mean he was just standing there all in the open digging in his nose with no tissue, and just imagine the next person who comes there and pumps their gas, a strangers boogers all over their hands. Just nasty!!!!
Its not always men, once I had witnesses to my annoyance, me, ma, keonia and the rugrats were riding in keonia's truck and ma was looking down in the car at the lady next to us so that made us all look, I mean all of us,( we were at a red light) and so we're all watching this lady go to town digging in her nose, all of a sudden just when we thought "this bitch is sick" she digs some more and puts her finger in her mouth. I ALMOST LOST MY MIND!!!!!!
We were so disgusted we were pecking on our windows and screaming 'ugh'!!!! the truck was shaking because we all were trying to get this lady's attention. Of course she never turned her head. I mean some people are just disgusting.
I don't like to think I attract nose pickers, but that's what it's looking like. Maybe a higher power is testing my patience? I don't know but I think if I see another person digging in their nose in public, I just might walk over and hand them some tissue. But let me say this, this better not ever happen with a friend or family member of mine because I will call you out on it, and you might hate me later.
Totally Annoyed!!!
ok so lately everytime i'm out in public I might of course people watch here and there and glance over at people and lately I have just been seeing the nastiest shit ever. GROWN ASS MEN DIGGING IN THEIR NOSES IN PUBLIC!!!!
Yesterday at Kmart we were walking to our car and one man was actually sitting with the car door open one leg out digging in his nose for a few more minutes before he went inside the store, I could not stop staring at him, and he actually stared at me too as if I was doing something so gross. I gave him the meanest look ever, you know the look where your nose flares and your lips kinda pucker, like UGH!!
Then today in rush hour traffic, I mean bumper to bumper I just glanced over again to my right and yet another man driving with one hand and digging in his nose with the other, that is the nastiest shit ever, I cannot get over this, I was mugging him so bad I almost hit the car in front of me, I wanted to roll down my window and scream "you nasty ass, get some tissue" but I stayed in my own car and kept my composure.
How could I forget before I got on the expressway after work I stopped to get gas and it was about 4 people standing out pumping gas and enjoying the warm breeze, I guess the guy in the mercedes thought he was all that, so he was like leaning on his benz pumping his gas and guess what??? DIGGING IN HIS GOTDAMN NOSE!!!!! I mean I looked at him and rolled my eyes, how could people not be more discreet? I mean he was just standing there all in the open digging in his nose with no tissue, and just imagine the next person who comes there and pumps their gas, a strangers boogers all over their hands. Just nasty!!!!
Its not always men, once I had witnesses to my annoyance, me, ma, keonia and the rugrats were riding in keonia's truck and ma was looking down in the car at the lady next to us so that made us all look, I mean all of us,( we were at a red light) and so we're all watching this lady go to town digging in her nose, all of a sudden just when we thought "this bitch is sick" she digs some more and puts her finger in her mouth. I ALMOST LOST MY MIND!!!!!!
We were so disgusted we were pecking on our windows and screaming 'ugh'!!!! the truck was shaking because we all were trying to get this lady's attention. Of course she never turned her head. I mean some people are just disgusting.
I don't like to think I attract nose pickers, but that's what it's looking like. Maybe a higher power is testing my patience? I don't know but I think if I see another person digging in their nose in public, I just might walk over and hand them some tissue. But let me say this, this better not ever happen with a friend or family member of mine because I will call you out on it, and you might hate me later.
Totally Annoyed!!!
Friday, June 11, 2010
Lost Track
I think out of all the different things that have been going on in my life within the last year i've lost track of what my original goal was. I remember my goal for the year 2008/2009 was to have a complete family (which included Eimen) and we moved into a new place to start off fresh and new. Then when things shifted and went sour my goal went with it. I'm just now realizing I need to either complete that goal even if it does have a few alterations to it or make a new one.
I think I'll keep the original goal of having a complete family and being more focused on family things, because I was just getting started when tragedy struck so its time to keep it moving. And what better time than with a new baby coming?
I'm sure I am not the only one who has set important goals for myself and has lost track along the way, anyone else?
I think I'll keep the original goal of having a complete family and being more focused on family things, because I was just getting started when tragedy struck so its time to keep it moving. And what better time than with a new baby coming?
I'm sure I am not the only one who has set important goals for myself and has lost track along the way, anyone else?
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Just Want to Scream!!!!
From yesterday:
Have you ever been so annoyed at someone or something that you just want to SCREAM!!!!!! I swear lately I have been so annoyed with the little things some people have been doing to me and around me. I want to scream so bad, I just don't want to scare the baby. I hate when people either buddy up around you and now you're the outsider ( I can really give two shits anyway) or when people act like they're so much better than you. " oh I have this or that or we're doing this" this really bugs me but all I have been doing is ignoring and walking away. I notice it!!!
I guess you only suppose to keep some people for a season and guess what? the season's changing.
Have you ever been so annoyed at someone or something that you just want to SCREAM!!!!!! I swear lately I have been so annoyed with the little things some people have been doing to me and around me. I want to scream so bad, I just don't want to scare the baby. I hate when people either buddy up around you and now you're the outsider ( I can really give two shits anyway) or when people act like they're so much better than you. " oh I have this or that or we're doing this" this really bugs me but all I have been doing is ignoring and walking away. I notice it!!!
I guess you only suppose to keep some people for a season and guess what? the season's changing.
Monday, June 7, 2010
lazy
It is so funny to me how lazy I am. Then again it's kinda annoying. I mean I dont want to anything that takes me off the couch or my big comfy bed. I heard about women like this and I could never relate but oh man I can relate now. Im doing good if I make it to work and on time. I didnt use to be like this hopefully i'll get back to normal or at least after angel face is born. I hope someone can relate????
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)